Couch Shopping Sucks

(aka... a sure fire way to get a bad case of FFUs)


I had couch issues this weekend. First a little background... then the story... then a definition... then you are going to need to comment. Are you ready for all that? Do you have enough coffee? LOL.

I have couch issues and I have then because I have three very messy kids. I have always wanted a nice couch. But when there are toddlers running around spilling milk, mashing in crumbs and even occasionally pee-ing /throwing up on your couch... you don't buy a nice couch. You get crap couches from want ads or family left overs. And that is what we have had for about 10 years. And the couch was about 5 years old even before that. YUCK! I made it work though, I had nice throws... I found a fabulous paint color so it didn't look awful in the room.

It was decided more then a year ago when we started house hunting that we would NOT be bringing our crappy couch into our new house. Period. And last week when we moved, the couch went to the road for the garbage man to pick up and the cushions to my Mom to make new dog beds out of. (Yeah, cushions for dog beds, tells ya how nice.) But with the couch to the road, we had an empty living room with only one chair (a leather one I bought last year and wouldn't let the kids eat on, lol). A week with no couch is not fun! Especially when you are working your butt off and have no place to sit down and rest for five freaking minutes.

This Saturday was finally the day to couch shop!! The day I had been waiting for years to arrive. My Mom came along and first we hit Rudy Gordon, a shop with a "sale" because of remolding going on. Yeah, right. $1500 for a "clearance" couch. Next it was off to the Raymour & Flanigan (Real) Clearance Center. Green is officially the "reject" couch color of the year. There was DOZENS of green couches. DOZENS! After an hour and a half... there was only one. ONE couch that I was so so on. It was a couch and love seat set. It was a one-of-a-kind piece. It had been a custom order fabric thing that the customer decided they didn't want. The thing had great lines, kind of curvy and square at the same time. Check it out HERE. The custom ordered fabric was a light beige/cream color and it was textured with a grid of squares. The price was good too. It had been over $2000, and was now $998 (for couch and love seat!). But, it was a little "different", so I didn't buy it on the spot. I decided to try the regular Raymour & Flanigan Showroom. HA! Their things were 3 times the cost of the clearance center couches.

I ended up putting the couches on hold. I really wanted Ron to see them. I could just picture him seeing them for the first time and scrunching up his nose with a "I don't like them". Once back home I was able to convince Ron to go for a ride to see the set. But not before agreeing to look at what furniture BJs (the wholesale club) had. Hmmm... guess what, BJs didn't have any, must be the wrong season for couches. Thankfully, Ron didn't hate the couches I had on hold. BUT he was more practical then I was. Creamy beige... 3 kids... ice cream... football shoes... muddy hands... it would be a losing battle. I had to admit, as much as I liked the set, he was right.

So, we did another walk around the big clearance warehouse. He liked a Natuzzi leather set. Yuck. I hate tan leather with poorly color matched piping and cushions you can't vacuum between. Finally, we settled on this couch you see in the pictures. Check it out HERE. Under florescent lights, it looked like a moss green so I paid it no mind. But the salesman had us take a pillow outside and low and behold it was espresso! A very nice milk chocolate shade of brown. I liked the lines. A more "grown up" feeling couch, for sure. The price was great, only $400. Which left plenty for a cool accent chair too.

We brought it home and put it right in place. This big family room is on the back of the house. You can get to it via that hallway I showed you, and also from the kitchen. It is pretty big, about 16' x 25'. I am calling this my "Summer" furniture arrangement. For now the focus is on the TV and the views out those big windows, but in "Winter" it will be on the fireplace. By about 9pm Saturday night, I had a bad case of FFUs.

FFUs... I don't think I have told you about those. Its the "Frumpy Fat and Uglies". It is a hormonal condition that is for sure. LOL. It is that feeling that absolutely nothing is going the way you want and while nothing is going right, you catch your reflection and think you look nasty. All you want to do is eat ice cream and you do, but that makes you feel even more frumpy fat and ugly.

I decided that I think I hate the couch.

I had this vision of how my family room was going to come together and it just isn't coming together. Why couldn't there be a beaming white light in the showroom highlighting the couch of my dreams with music playing and the thought it my head saying "OMG... there it is... the couch of my dreams!" For some reason, clearance centers don't allow returns. Whatever. Maybe I could put it on Craig's List. But then I am right back where I started. An empty room with no couch and no hopes of finding a good one... see, what did I tell you... FFUs. Because not only is there couch problems, but I swear I don't have a single thing I can wear in my closet and I hate my hair and feel I should lose another 30 lbs. And the ice cream the other night was Peanut Butter Ripple.

Maybe I'll like it better with some cool throw pillows. Maybe I will like it better rearranged in the room differently. I don't know. What do you think?